Love and Annarchy
by Moczo
Summary: ::Sequel to Lesson One:: It's a snow day, and to Princess Anna of Arendelle, that has only one meaning: Fun times with her big sister. But when a certain Scottish princess makes moves to monopolize Elsa's time Anna has no choice but to take matters into her own hands. And considering the nature of Merida's 'interest', that spells trouble with a capital 'ANNA'.


_**Love and Annarchy**_

**(*)**

Anna looked out the window, and a giant smile burst onto her face.

"Yessssss," she squealed on seeing the early Autumn storm, unseasonable but wonderfully fluffy. Nearly a foot of fresh powder fallen overnight. The kingdom was settling down to keep warm and stay in for the day with their families, and even the assorted ambassadors were basically choosing to lock up in their embassies and spend the day catching up on busywork.

And that meant _Elsa was free. _

Anna squirmed into a dress suitable for going outside, and sprinted down the hall as fast as humanly possible, stopping only to give Kristoff a kiss on the cheek as she passed him coming out of his room. For some reason Elsa wouldn't let them have a room together until they'd been dating for a few months. "Morning honey! It's a snow day!"

Kristoff winced. "Ugh. Guess I don't get to…"

Anna sprinted off.

"… never mind."

Anna took off down the hall, used a suit of armor as a pivot to turn down the hall, slid down the bannister to cut across the ball room, and then used a painting as a makeshift ladder back to the second floor (It was faster than going straight, the servants would all be on the second floor at this time of day and it was _super _awkward to get through them. You only wanted to step into Helga's window-cleaning bucket _once _before you started planning alternate routes). She slid to a halt outside the royal master bedroom and knocked on the door in her usual pattern, squealing, "Elsa! Elsa! Wanna build a snowman?!"

What? She was eighteen, not _boring_. It was a snow day!

Something rustled about inside the bedroom, and she heard Elsa's voice saying something that sounded curiously like, "Hell."

A second voice, already in the room, said, "Bloody hell, can we nae even ha' a meal in peace in this maddening place?!"

"It's her house, Merida!"

"Och, lil' siblin's. Worst thing in th' world…"

The door opened, and Anna found princess Merida of DunBroch, her gigantic red hair filling up half the doorway and a slight flush to her cheeks.

"Oh. Um. Hi!" Anna said a bit awkwardly. "I wasn't aware Elsa had… company."

"We were havin' breakfast. A lovely taste, it was, when 'twas private," the Scottish princess said, her tone just barely on the 'pleasant' side of the pleasantness-to-venomous scale.

"Oh. I'm sorry. It was… early," Anna said.

"Traditional time fer breakfast, I hear."

"I… guess. It is!" Anna said. "Um. I haven't had breakfast?"

"Well. Perhaps ye should go about findin' some of yer own? Elsewhere?"

"_Merida_," snapped a voice from inside the room. "We have. _Plenty."_

Merida winced. "Princess Anna. Please come alon', an' join us," she grumbled, turning back to walk into the room. Anna thought she faintly heard the older girl muttering something that sounded like, "Snow beasties, and blasted crazy lasses, and her own bloody panic fits, I'll never be gettin' this girl alone fer more'n ten bloody minutes at a time, I swear…"

Anna walked into her sister's room to find Elsa sitting at her personal table, a large tray of eggs, bacon, salted fish, and a steaming kettle of what Anna suspected was hot chocolate (she knew her sister's tastes). Elsa was wearing a fur-lined robe, her big fuzzy slippers, and an expression that suggested she was being hunted. "Anna. How nice of you to join us!"

"Is there… some reason I shouldn't?" Anna asked.

"Aye," Merida said.

"_No,_" Elsa snapped. "We were having a friendly breakfast, to help build relations between our kingdoms."

"In a sense," Merida said cheerfully. "Mah idea, an' such. Yer sister's a bit shy."

"Oh, yes! She totally is," Anna said cheerfully, finally finding a topic she could fully comprehend. "But you know, it isn't really her fault. She had a kind of unorthodox childhood, and…"

"I wasna sayin' it was a flaw," Merida said cheerfully. "Point o' fact, I find it _really _cute."

Elsa turned a shade of red more suited to a tomato than a princess and hissed, _"Merida_."

"Wha? 'Tis _adorable_. Ye're all blushy and shy and have _no _idea how tae just shut up and accept a lil' affection."

"You. _Promised_."

"Promised what?" Anna asked.

"_Nothing." _Elsa squeaked, her blush somehow deepening. Anna vaguely wondered if her sister had somehow switched to having fire magic, because she _really _looked like she was about to burst into flames. "She didn't promise _anything _and she didn't show up here first thing in the morning to jump into my bed to wake me up, and didn't her promise at all. _Merida._"

"I truly dinnae! A friendly meal, nothin' more," Merida said cheerfully. "And if I perhaps got yer mind ontae certain things aforehand that led ye to do some o' those things _after, _well, then, so much th' better for me…"

"Shut. _Up_." Elsa hissed.

Anna blinked, a bit out of her depth here but starting to grow suspicious. "Um… well. It's good that you didn't do… whatever you… didn't do? I'm a little confused. Getting some mixed signals, is all. Did she show up in the morning, or did she spend the night?"

"Och, I _wish_," Merida muttered.

Elsa went instantly from red to white, blanching so suddenly Anna feared another eternal winter. "_Merida!" _

"Wha'? I do so love slumber parties," Merida said, a wicked grin on her face. "We could ha' a pillow fight!"

Anna smiled, finally glad to have _some _common ground with the new girl. "Ooooh, I love slumber parties! We can tell scary stories, and do our hair, and talk about boys we all like… I like Kristoff. Well, you knew I liked Kristoff, I'm like… dating him. It was kind of a thing, there was some life-saving… mutual, I think, I'm _preeeeetty _sure I did a lot of the work, and…"

"Nae exactly what I meant, lass. Though I'm _quite _certain that what I have in mind _would _be rather on the scary side fer ye, so it is a _bit _like tellin' a ghost story, I s'pose," Merida said. She was, despite her initial misgivings, rather enjoying Anna's company. It was rare to get to tease Elsa so _blatantly _and yet be so able to get away with it.

"What did you mean, then?" Anna asked.

"_Nothing,_" Elsa snapped. "She meant _nothing at all _because nothing of that sort is happening ever, and she—"

She, stopped, then, at the sensation of Merida idly slipping a bare foot under the hem of her robe beneath the table, and running it lightly up and down her calf.

"Elsa?" Anna asked after her sister had frozen (HA!) in place for several long, empty seconds.

"Um… uh… that is…" Elsa said, trying really hard to think while Merida just smiled at her with a big, wide, innocent smile that Elsa very seriously wanted to punch her for… _after _she did some other things to her. Oh Hell. "That is to… t-to say…"

"Perhaps it might be happenin', one fine day," Merida offered. "After all, who knows where life shall take us all? I think we shall be great friends, indeed. An' maybe a bit more?"

"M-Merida… what are you…"

Anna stood up, her eyes lighting up with tiny fury. "_Fine_. I can see what's going on here, and I'm not gonna just… _sit _and watch it, even if the bacon! Is! _Perfect!_"

"… It _is _rather good bacon?" Merida said, not quite sure what to make of this reaction. She hadn't been running her leg up toward _Anna's _thigh slowly and torturously. And while Elsa had been having a hard time hiding her reaction, she'd seen no indication that Anna had noticed… well, much of anything. She wasn't _observant_, per se.

"You must think I'm an idiot, _Princess Merida_. But I. See. Through. _You_," Anna snapped, her eyes narrowing. "Secret meetings? Special slumber parties with things I 'wouldn't understand'? _More than friends?!_ I would have to be an idiot to not see the signs! And you'd better believed that I won't let this go on. Not without a _fight!_"

_Oh, Hell, _Merida thought. "Now, lass, I was just teasing a bit…"

_Oh, __**Hell, **_Elsa thought. "Anna, please don't…"

"I'll show you, that no matter _how_ many secrets you keep, Elsa will still choose me in the end!" Anna snapped, storming out of the room to leave her two breakfast-mates in identical states of confused silence.

"… Did yer sister just declare her love for ye, or…?" Merida asked, after a brief pause.

"Oh, shut up," Elsa muttered, standing up to get away from the foot that had only just reached her knee. Merida really was relentless. And it _wasn't _cute at _all. _"This is all your fault, whatever it is. You've got Anna acting all… all… _Anna_."

"… so, since we may be getting' found out soon anyway, how about a kiss fer luck? Or several?" Merida asked, grinning openly.

"_Insufferable_."

(*)

Anna sprinted down the hall, swung across the chandelier over the main hall, and landed on the side balcony near the hall leading to the first floor steps. Kristoff would be outside by now; he didn't need to handle any of his Ice-master duties on a snowy day like this, but he liked to go hang out with Sven for awhile in the morning. Y'know, breakfast, coffee, some light discussion. Sometimes they'd sing a duet.

It was a really nice way to spend the morning, Anna had found. She joined them regularly. Once the three of them had made a campfire and done a sing-along for the whole morning, watching the sunrise.

Anna and Kristoff worked so well together for a _reason_.

But today, she had concerns that surpassed the need for anything like singing with reindeer, as important as that was. She sprinted to the rear gates, leaping (yes, leaping) into her snowboots, and storming across the grounds toward the stables, rapidly outpacing the guards who tried their level best to escort her. Honestly, everyone going out of their way to treat her like she was a princess or something. It was nice of them, but if they couldn't manage the stamina to pull it off well, why even bother?

She slammed open the door to the royal stables, making several horses and one reindeer start in a panic, before silencing them with a shout of, "_Animals, stay calm!_" and a sweeping gesture of princessly command.

The stables fell silent.

"I… have no idea how you do that," Kristoff said, after a brief pause. Sven kind of just started, carrot still hanging from his mouth.

"SHhhhhh. Kristoff, we have a _crisis _and as my lovely-wovey snuggle bear you _have _to help me get to the bottom of it and stop it before all is lost!" Anna proclaimed. Then, lowering her tone for dramatic effect, she related the obvious and undeniable evidence the morning with Elsa and Merida had left her:

"Princess Merida is trying to _replace me as Elsa's little sister._"

Once again, silence fell, Anna assumed due to the sheer gravity of her revelation. And once again, it was after a pause of several confused seconds that Kristoff broke the silence.

"Um… don't take this the wrong way. But are you _sure _you didn't just eat a half-pound of chocolate and have a weird hallucination?" he asked gently. "I only ask because that's happened like, five times since we started dating, and we've really only been dating a month. So it kinda seems like… a regular thing."

"Of course not!" Anna said indignantly. She then paused, and said, "Well… probably. I usually don't really get into the palace sweet supplies until closer to noon. Gotta stay healthy, right? Breakfast is important. And neither Elsa _nor _Merida were bright orange with pink polka dots when I was eating with them! That's a good sign, usually."

"Okay, it sounds like you actually saw what you saw," Kristoff admitted. "But… I do have to ask what makes you think it? I mean, I haven't like… stopped to _talk _to the diplomats a lot, but the Scottish ones seemed pretty nice at the party. They taught you drinking songs and stuff."

"Hmmm. I guess they did… though why does everyone call them 'drinking' songs? I sang them just fine without any water," Anna said thoughtfully. "… no! I can't be distracted now! Not when Elsa is being led astray by some… some… _imposister." _

"… A combination of sister and imposter?" Kristoff asked without any emotion in his voice, by this point pretty understanding of how Anna's mind worked.

"Exactly! That's why I love you. You got that clever brain," Anna said appreciatively. "But the evidence is very clear. Just _look _at her!"

"... She seems nice?"

"Yes. _Nice_," Anna said slyly. "_Just like me_."

"Lots of people are nice, honey..."

"But how many of those people also have _red hair_?" Anna said, a smirk of triumph on her lips and an eyebrow arched in superiority.

"… … Um… probably a lot?"

"But how many of _those_," Anna said, her tone still one suggesting she really thought she was revealing key data that Kristoff could not possibly have worked out on his own, "Are also _charmingly quirky_? Just. Like. _Me?!" _

Kristoff pondered this. "Does Merida really count as 'quirky'? I mean, she has some calluses you wouldn't expect to see in a princess, but I hear Scottish people and weapons are kinda…overly friendly. Maybe she just takes after her dad…"

"Her. _Dad_," Anna said, her tone one of triumph. "Her dad is a king, you know. _My dad was a king!_"

"… …. I'm… pretty sure that's mostly just a requirement to be a princess."

"Exactly! A princess! Like! _Me!_"

"Honey… I'm just gonna go out on a limb here. Totally wild guess. Random words chosen from the ether. Do you think _maybe _that… _just _maybe… you are mostly just worried because you only just reconnected with your sister, and you're overcompensating to the idea of someone else spending time with her? Just… throwing that out there."

"Of _course _not, Kristoff. That's like… looney. You're being a looney. But it's okay, 'cause you're cute," Anna said, tousling his hair. "Trust. Me. I'm preeeeetty much an expert on having sisters. I _know _when someone is trying to convince mine to trade me in for the feisty Scottish model. Now, I need you to be a good boyfriend and help me figure out the best way to destroy a girl that I barely know. Y'know. As a couple."

"Uh… huh." Turning to Sven, he said, "Sven. Do you think Anna is overreacting?"

"_Not at all!_" Sven said.

"… What."

"_If Kristoff got a new reindeer, I'd be super upset! Why, I would do whatever I could to prove I was the better reindeer!" _Sven said cheerfully.

"No, wait, what's…?" Kristoff began.

"What? You think I should like, try to out-princess her?" Anna asked.

"_Sure, why not? It can't go badly at all!" _Sven said. "_You can take a look at all the things Elsa likes about her, then do them better!" _

"You are a _genius_, Sven!" Anna said, sprinting out of the stable without stopping to do anything, like describe her plans in detail. Or, apparently, think.

Kristoff and Sven stood in silence, the blonde human staring in open distrust at the brunette reindeer.

"Traitor."

(*)

Anna was fairly sure that a reindeer wouldn't suggest something if it weren't a good idea, and so she set about on her quest to determine the best aspects of Princess Merida. What exactly, about her, made Elsa view her as the best choice to replace Anna and become Princess Meridanna of Scotlarrendelle.

For starters, Merida was pretty much just Anna in most ways. And Anna knew that she was _super _quirkier, it was part of her charm. So there must be something in the other attributes Merida brought to the table. But what _were _they?

Well, her parents were interesting. King Fergus was a lot of fun, and Queen Elinor… um… had a nice dress. But Elsa was kinda-sorta a shrinking violet of the shrinkingest sort. She didn't dislike people, per se, but socialization wasn't high on her list of things to do. So it probably wasn't bringing boisterous Scottish folks into the castle.

The strange exotic accent from foreign lands? Well, it made it hard to tell what Merida was saying, which Anna guessed might count as useful for family. Miscommunication was the heart of a loving family relationship, after all.

The archery? Well, as far as Anna could tell it was Merida's only hobby, so it was probably important.

Anna sighed. "You know. I probably should have like, tried… _meeting _Merida a little bit before I decided to do this. But then Elsa would want _me _to be her new sister, and I wouldn't have a problem because I'm also her old sister. Complex stuff."

Anna stood, smoothing out her dress and putting on her best can-do smile. "Just gotta be confident! I'm 45% sure this won't go wrong, and that's pretty good considering I'm going in with like, _no _plan. It's like Machiavelli said… plans are for wimps, so just rush in and see what happens!"

(Anna, despite what she herself might have told people when she had too much sugar in her system, had not actually read Machiavelli.)

(*)

Elsa sighed as she strode through the gardens, looking at the trees glistening with snow. "You know, everyone expects me to say Winter, but I really think Spring is my favorite time of year. The flowers, the sun, everything. This show just ruins the effect."

Merida yawned. "Och, aye. There be nothin' I love more'n wandering through plants'n'such all day, wastin' a perfectly fine day fer huntin' and ridin' in smellin' the flowers."

"… You have _no _romance in your soul, do you."

"I'm _tryin' _tae have romance in me soul! Ye won't _let _me!" Merida protested. "'Tis nae my fault that every time I'm tryin' ta actually _be _somethin' romantic, ye get all 'oooooh, but _Merida _fer certain we must be nothin' but friends an' do nothin' interesting because I love being a bore'."

Elsa tried really hard to look angry, but it didn't come easily. Fighting down a smile, she said, "I do _not _sound like that."

"Nae," Merida admitted. "Ye have a _much _prettier voice'n me."

"… I didn't say that."

"Nay, _I _did. On account o' it bein' true indeed," Merida said with an earnest smile on her face. "Ye have the loveliest voice. I could sit an' listen to ye talk for hours. Preferably starin' into those eyes while I do it, too."

Elsa felt her cheeks suddenly go very unbearably warm. "You _promised_. This morning was bad enough, but…"

"If I'm not allowed tae pay ye a compliment," Merida said with a pout, "we'll soon have naught tae speak of. Ye _have _tae cut me some slack somewhere."

Elsa didn't bother to hide her smile this time. "Actually, technically speaking, I _don't_. You're the one doing the 'pursuing'. I don't have to do anything."

"Och, but ye are a _devil_."

"I'm sorry, I was under the impression I was resisting temptation," Elsa said primly, "Which would make me positively angelic. Unlike a certain firey-haired…"

"_Dyeamon!"_ screamed a female voice from across the gardens.

Elsa and Merida blinked. "A… a wha', now?" Merida asked.

"Oh no," Elsa muttered. She had _no _idea what the voice had just said, but she knew damn well who was saying it and she didn't scream unless something _wrong _was happening.

Anna sprinted up to them, a crossbow in her hands and what Elsa could only assume was meant to be an expression of determination on her face as she glared at Merida. "Pr…um. Preencess Moorida! Eye haf coom forrrrrrrth to… tay? Tay challenge yoo!"

Merida did something that Elsa thought she had not seen her do even a single time in the, admittedly short, time of their acquaintance. She just kind of… stared. Blankly ahead, in total silence.

Merida… _Merida, _who had a smarmy reply for literally everything and didn't seem happy unless she was throwing someone off balance…was struck silent. Elsa would have smiled in amusement at the sight of it if she hadn't been rather speechless herself.

"Well? What… Woot? Woot say ye!" Anna asked. "Aye shool defeat ye upoon thy feeeeeld oof battle an' shall then have me sistarrrrrr!"

Silence. A solid five minutes. Anna began to wonder if she was, perhaps, too intimidating and Merida was simply so certain of her inevitable defeat that she had chosen to give up without a response. "Well? Woot… sae? Sae ye, charrrrrrrlatan?" she asked again, hefting her weapon in a way she hoped was intimidating. She wasn't 100% sure what the right way to hold it was, since she hadn't found any bolts to load it with.

Silence once again.

Elsa blinked a few times, before rubbing her head and sighing. "Well. Anna. This has been… an experience. Princess Merida, will you please excuse us? I believe my sister has an important matter of state to discuss with me."

Anna smiled brilliantly at this. It was _working! _"Eye, me sistarrrrrrr! Coom, an leet us goo aboot in the talking o' Arrrrrendelle, as we arrrrrrre sistarrrrrrrs an-"

"_Now_," Elsa growled, grabbing her sister by the hand and dragging her off toward the castle.

Anna, running a little to keep up with her sister's longer stride, nonetheless took the time to turn a triumphant smirk on Merida and stick her tongue out.

Y'know. In a dignified way.

(*)

Elsa dragged Anna up a flight of stairs and down another (Elsa hadn't taken much time out of her room as a kid, and so unlike Anna she didn't know it was a lot faster to just scramble up the suit of armor and swing across on the chandelier to get to the adjoining hallway going down) to reach an unoccupied study. She slammed the door behind them and turned to face Anna, arms crossed. Anna assumed this was a sign of sisterly approval. Her scowl certainly looked approving. Ish.

"Anna," she said very slowly, as if she wasn't completely sure that Anna understood her when she spoke anymore. "I have no idea what _any _of what you just said was or why you have that weaponry in your hands. But _please _tell me you did not just make some kind of incredibly poorly planned attempt to assassinate the princess of Scotland?"

"Ook, nee! Oi would neverrrrrrrrrrr bai so-"

"_Stop talking like that_."

Anna smiled cheerfully. "Too awesome, huh? Yeah, I can be that way. It runs in the family, y'know? Family awesome. We have that. Nobody else does, because _we _are family. Us. You 'n me."

"I… that. Anna. You will… I mean…" Elsa said, finally just giving up with a kind of pained sigh. "Okay. Okay. I think I am running behind on logic by a depressing amount, here. So I am just going to sit, very calmly, and quietly. And I will let you explain exactly how your reached the conclusions that you have reached. I'm sure it will be… eventful."

Elsa sat down in a nearby chair, and very calmly cast a cool, dispassionate, regal gaze upon her sister and heir. "Please begin, Anna. I assure you, I will not be angry. I know you must have had a good reason for what you have done."

There was silence for a few seconds whilst Anna gathered her thoughts, thinking back to the beginning, when she had first recognized the need for her great planning. "Hmmmmm. Okay. Well, it all started when I realized that you were thinking about replacing me with Merida…"

"_You idiot!_" Elsa snapped, shooting to her feet, her fists clenched as she glared at Anna with so much force that it seemed somehow odd that Anna was not reduced to ashes on the spot.

"Wh-what are…?" Anna squeaked, preparing to engage in indignant (If slightly scared) defense of herself…

Only to stop dead when she saw that in addition to anger, Elsa's eyes were glimmering with barely contained tears.

"Elsa… are… are you okay?" Anna asked, all thoughts of both fear and indignation vanishing from her mind.

"Replace you? _Replace _you?!" Elsa snapped, a trembling sob under her obvious anger. "I…! How could you possibly ever…! I would… you're my family! The only family I have _left_, the only family I may _ever _have, and _nobody _could ever replace you! How could you even possibly _think _that, even for a second?! After everything we've been through, I…"

Anna said, in a very quiet voice, "Um… I'm sorry."

Elsa winced, the obvious guilt in Anna's voice defusing her anger and leaving only an aching sadness and more than a little guilt. Rubbing her eyes and sniffling slightly, she said, in a _much _softer tone, "No. No, _I'm_ sorry. I… after how horribly I've treated you since we were kids, asking you to trust me is something I've no right to do."

"Oh! Oh, no, no!" Anna said, raising her hands. "It's… not that! It's not like I don't trust you, because I _totally _trust you, you have a _very _trustworthy face, and…"

"Anna. Really. I understand. I shut you out for years, why shouldn't you think I wouldn't do it again?" Elsa asked, smiling sadly.

"Because you said you wouldn't!"

"And why should you believe me? I haven't given you much reason to take me at my word. I've done..." Elsa sighed. "God. I've done just about everything wrong, haven't I? It seems like every time I turn around some new disaster is hitting you because of me. I almost killed you _twice_, I ruined your childhood, I shoved you aside and hurt you and… God, you're worried about me replacing you? I'm shocked you didn't try to replace _me _years ago…"

"Elsa! Elsa. _Breathe_," Anna said, putting her hands on Elsa's shoulders. "It's okay, get it? You didn't mean any of it. You've had a rougher time of it than I have. I understand that."

"A rougher time? I _have _been ignoring you, Anna. How awful must that be for you? We… we only _just _patched things up. We opened up the gates, and everything seemed so good, and here I am ruining it again, because of a girl I… I don't know, even. I have no idea what she is to me. I barely know her, and yet she's monopolizing my time right when you need it most," Elsa shuddered. "I'm so sorry. I… God, at times like this I really wonder why you didn't just leave me on the mountain to rot."

"Because you'd have frozen the kingdom?" Anna asked brightly. "Oh, and you're my _sister _and I love you, doofus."

Elsa chuckled bitterly, rubbing a tear from her eye. "Thank you, but… I understand. You can tell me how you really feel. I've been a horrible sister, a horrible queen, a horrible… person. Maybe things would have been better if you'd been the first born. The queen. You're the charming one, the personable one, you always brighten everything around you. You'd be a great ruler, and I'm just this… this anchor around your neck. The freak who has to be hidden away, the wreck who managed to drag Arendelle into half a dozen diplomatic incidents on her _coronation day_…"

Anna stared at Elsa for a few long, silent seconds.

And then she burst out into helpless giggles.

Elsa blinked, staring at Anna with a sort of confused, puffy-eyed pout that made Anna's laughter redouble, the younger girl clutching at her sides as she laughed so hard it was almost painful. "O-oh! Oh, Elsa, that… hahahahahaha! Oh, wow, you are just… hahahahahHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, I can't…! I can't take it, heheheheahahahahaha!"

Elsa sighed. "I'm trying to be serious."

Anna wiped away a tear of mirth. "S-so am I! It's just… j-just…" she took a deep breath. "Okay. Okay. Um… I love you, but you _really _are kind of a doofus, you know that?"

"… I… feel I should be insulted."

"Nah, you're a doofus in a good way," Anna said with an easy grin.

"… Thank you?"

"What I mean is… Elsa, _look _at you," Anna said, eyes twinkling. "You're a glamorous magical snow queen! You have super powers and wear a dress made of magic sparkling ice and… _look _at you! And you think _I'm _the special one? People are in _awe _of you from the moment they meet you! Even before you were all…" she gestured again at the shimmering dress, "_…this. _You had this… aura. You're the dignified one, the graceful one. The one people admire and respect. Can I tell you something? Whenever I need to be… y'know, a princess? Make people listen to me? I do it by acting like you."

"… You're kidding."

"No, really! Watch, watch," Anna said, standing up. She straightened her back, clasping her hands in front of herself, and took a deep breath. She gazed down on Elsa, eyes half-lidded, an expression of utter serenity on her face, and Elsa fought the urge to gasp. It was…basically the expression and posture she practiced before state functions. It was eerily like looking into a mirror that altered her features to make her look like Anna somehow.

And then Anna grinned, breaking the illusion. "Seeee? People _respect _you."

"But they _like _you."

"They like you too! The skating rink is super popular."

"That isn't the same thing! They like what I can _do _for them, maybe, but deep down they know what I could do if things went badly. They all remember, Anna. On some level, they're afraid. And you know what? They _should be_. Because…"

Anna lightly bopped her on the head.

"… Ow," Elsa said, more in surprise than anything else.

"You are… you are _such _a dummy," Anna said. "And if people are afraid of you, it's because _they _are dummies and don't see that you'd never hurt anyone on purpose. Because you're like… _silly _amounts of nice. Dummy."

Elsa was silent for a few long moments, before she finally chuckled lightly. "You know, you can get in trouble for calling the queen a dummy. Some queens take it personally."

"It's all right. I know the queen of Arendelle," Anna said cheerfully. "She's got some issues, but she's a really nice girl. She'll go easy on me."

"You sure about that?" Elsa asked with a quirked eyebrow and a smirk.

"I think so," Anna said. "See, she's got a sister who is kind of a doofus too, so she's pretty used to girls who make poor decisions around her."

"Like calling her a dummy?" Elsa asked, giggling by now despite herself.

"That was a _super _bad decision," Anna agreed. "Some queens take it _really _personally."

"Luckily, I'm not one of them," Elsa said with a smile. "I try to be understanding of my subjects and their occasional doofus behavior. Mostly because I'm rather bad about it myself."

"Don't worry!" Anna said cheerfully. "As a good princess, it's my duty to tell the queen when she's being a doofus. After all, it takes one to know one."

"You're a marvel."

"I know, right?" Anna asked proudly. "No wonder you want to keep me around."

"And I always will, silly," Elsa said, hugging her sister. "Never think otherwise, okay? You'll always be family, and I'll never shut you out again. I swear."

"I know," Anna said, smiling over her sister's shoulder. "I apologize for thinking you'd be trying to replace me for the quirky Scottish version."

Elsa snorted, pushing her sister away with an annoyed expression on her face. "Really, Anna? You and Merida aren't really anything alike. You must know that, right?"

"Well, I don't really know her. She seems to spend all her time with you, is all…"

Elsa winced. "Trust me, I noticed. And in no _way _is that a replacement for you, trust me. She's… ugh. She's frustrating, and reckless, and childish, and she makes me so _angry _and…"

"And you keep spending time with her," Anna observed.

"I… well. I can hardly _not_. She's a visiting princess…"

"And you're the queen. You _could _pawn her off on someone. Oooh, like me! I'm _great _at socializing!" Anna said helpfully.

"I… well. I mean, it's just that… she…"

"She…?" Anna asked.

"… … Nothing," Elsa finished a bit lamely.

Anna scrunched up her face in the expression that was her way of saying, universally, 'This shall not _stand_'. "Oooooh no. Ooooooooooooooooh no. Elsa, you do _not _get out of it that easily. You go on and on about how you don't like this girl, but you go out of your way to spend time with her? You realize that doesn't make any sense, right? Because it makes no sense. And as princess of Arendelle, I _demand _an explanation!"

"As Queen of Arendelle, I outrank you."

"As the Queen of Arendelle's little sister, I will kick her butt if she doesn't _talk_," Anna said.

"As I recall, I tended to win when we scuffled as kids."

"You _cheated_."

"How?"

"By winning!" Anna snapped. "But not the point. You need to tell me, because you are acting _weird _and when you act weird, things go all freezy. And I can _tell _it has you having issues. You're not that hard to spot when you're being all issuey, you know. So _talk _to sissy. It will help!"

Elsa rolled her eyes. "There is _nothing _to talk about. I don't dislike Merida. I don't. She's a very nice girl. But she just makes me… uncomfortable. She's very aggressive, very direct. It's not something I'm used to, you know? All my life it was obey the rules, be a good girl. She seems to believe that the rules were specifically made to be broken for fun." She shook her head in what she had really meant to be confused frustration, but despite it found a small smile on her lips at her memory of the fiery princess. "And once she gets her head around an idea she just _never stops_. It's like she's physically incapable of just giving up. I mean, yes, I… didn't_ hate _it, but she seems to have redefined repeating it as her new goal in life and simply refuses to admit it was a _mistake_."

"What was a mistake?" Anna asked.

"Our kiss. But more than th-" Elsa began.

She stopped.

She froze.

She thought back _very carefully _on what she had just offhandedly told her sister, and who she had told it about.

_Oh. Oh, no. Oh, no no no no. _

"Er, no! I meant to say our… _ummmm… _our… ki…ck? We played a game of football, and…." Elsa began, feeling the quicksand of certain doom creeping its way up her legs as Anna stared at her, wide-eyed and silent. "Just a slip of the tongue… _not that there was tongue! _Because we didn't… I mean to say, she… we… oh God…"

Anna blinked. "You, and… and Merida? Kissing? Like… with lips?"

"No, see, it was kicking the football around, like the kids play in the street, and…"

"_Elsa_."

Elsa winced, letting her head fall in embarrassment and not a tiny amount of terror. "Yes… I… look, it was one time, and it was an accident and I _swear _I'm not encouraging it, but Merida is very…"

"So that means," Anna said, apparently still adding it up in her head, "that Merida spending all that time around you and being all touchy and possessive… does that mean Merida is _courting _you?"

"No! God, no! Courting means like… like love, and marriage! Merida is just being experimental and contrary, it's all about weird… feelings, and I'm sure it's more about hormones than any real emotion, and…"

"So Merida," Anna said, her eyes now very wide with shock as her brain pieced together the final chunk of the puzzle into a single crystalline whole, "is a _man?!_"

"… … … … …" Elsa said. It seemed the thing to do.

"I gotta admit, I never saw it coming. But I _have _heard that Scottish men wear skirts, so…"

"Anna," Elsa said flatly. "You are thinking of kilts. Men do wear them, but Merida is wearing a dress. Why do you think that is?"

"Becauuuuuuse… he is…." Anna began.

"No."

"Because… _she _is…" Anna said, before stopping. "Wait. If she's a she, then… and the kissing?"

"It was an _accident_," Elsa said firmly. "… Mostly. I mean, it was an accident, but I'm just not sure how… bad an accident it was. It only happened once. And she wants it to happen more. But I'm not sure if _I _want it to, but I know it _shouldn't _and she doesn't seem to care and…"

"How does that even work?" Anna asked.

"… Excuse me?"

"You're both girls," Anna said. "At least, I _think _y-"

"_Merida is a woman, yes._"

"So, if she's a girl, and _you're _a girl, how do you… y'know," Anna said, trailing off to make a kind of bizarre kissy face.

Elsa tried not to laugh, because it _wasn't _funny. This was serious, and would be treated as such, even if her sister was making fish lips and an exaggerated 'Mwah mwah mwah' sound. "The same way anyone kisses, Anna. Lips."

"Huh. I thought there might be different rules with two girls," Anna said thoughtfully. "Well. I dunno if that's a real thing. It wasn't in any of the books _I've _ever read, and I read the library's entire romance section! But if you like it, what's the issue?"

Elsa blinked. "You… you don't…"

"I don't what?" Anna asked, blinking in confusion.

"Anna. You realize that this is not… _approved behavior_. Right? Even the rumor of it could hurt my reputation. If it was _confirmed_, the scandal... other nations might stop trading with Arendelle, the church would go _insane_, the people would turn against me and I only just _started _to win them over, and…"

Anna lightly bopped her on the head again.

"… Stop _doing _that."

"Okay. Elsa. First of all, if you really want this thingamabob kept a secret, just _say _so," Anna said with her arms crossed. "I am like, the _best _at secrets. Second of all, I don't get why you're so convinced that everyone will hate you because you kiss a girl instead of a guy."

"Well… because traditionally, that _is _what happens, Anna."

"Not in any of the books _I've _read," Anna said proudly.

"Anna. You only read romance novels."

"… And cookbooks. Ooooh, wanna make brownies after we finish solving your existential crisis?" Anna asked.

"… Yes, but that's not what I'm getting at," Elsa admitted. "The thing, Anna, is that people _will _refuse to accept this. Even if we were commoners with no obligations, it wouldn't be tolerated, but we're _royalty_. We have responsibilities, and one of those is to carry on the royal line of our kingdoms. I can't exactly do that with Merida, if you'd missed that."

"It _does _seem like it would be kind of hard."

"And of course, that is, again, on top of the fact that our reputations would be absolutely destroyed if it was ever proven that we'd so much as kissed, much less that she's been hunting me down ever since like a wolf that smelled dinner," Elsa said with a sigh.

"Also makes sense," Anna said. "But I haven't heard the most important thing here, Elsa. What makes you _happy_? What do you _want _to do?"

"… I don't _know. _More than anything, what I feel is _confused_. I like her, certainly, and I…" Elsa sighed again, rubbing her temples. "It felt… good. I like that she likes me. She makes me feel beautiful and… and I guess I can admit the entire idea _does _sort of make me… tingle. But at the same time, in the back of my mind I know it's only a matter of time before she realizes what a freak I am and how wrong it all is, and…"

Anna lightly bopped her sister on the head.

"… Really. Stop that," Elsa growled.

"What I am getting," Anna said without acknowledging her sister's annoyance, "is that you like Merida, she makes you feel good, and you're attracted to her. But you're scared, so you're grasping for any reason to push her away that you can find. Is that about right?"

"No!"

"Oh really?" Anna said, eyebrow arched. "Then ask yourself a very simple question. If you had the choice between going up to Merida, right now, and kissing her square on the lips. Or never speaking to her again. In your heart, which would make you _happier_?"

Elsa blinked. "I… Anna, it isn't that simple."

"No, see, it _really is_." Anna crossed her arms. "There's reasons to not do either. There's reasons _to _do either. But in the end, what really matters is which option makes you happy, because that's what love is really about. So you need to shut up, and stop worrying about stupid junk like inappropriateness and politics, because that is all stuff you can worry about _after _you quit being wibbly wobbly over the situation and actually make a decision about what _you_ _want to do. _Do you like her back, or not? Choose, and we'll go from there. And whatever you pick, if it's what you really, truly want in your heart, I'll help you. Because we're sisters, and I'm not letting you go through life miserable. Got it?"

Elsa was silent for a long, long time, before she finally shook her head and gave a helpless chuckle. "When did you become the wise one?"

"I think over the course of this conversation," Anna said. "I'm pretty sure I was a doofus going in."

"You don't give yourself enough credit, little sis."

"Actually, I was just trying to be polite," Anna said cheerfully. "I_'_ve pretty much always been the wise one."

(*)

Merida was sitting alone in the palace gardens, wondering if she should be leaving; she couldn't be totally sure that Anna was not trying to replace her sister somehow. She hadn't had any actual crossbow bolts, granted, but a bulky weapon like that could be a club, and...

"Merida! Merida, sorry about that. Um… matters of state," Elsa said, running up to her as fast as her dress would allow, Anna in tow. The crossbow was gone, Merida noticed. She chose to interpret this as a good sign.

"Tell her!" Anna said cheerfully, pushing her sister forward.

"Hey! I never promised to…"

"You promised with your _eyes_. Tell her tell her _tell _her!" Anna cheered. She turned to Merida, smiling more brilliantly than a supernova, and said, "Princess Merida! You will _never believe _what Elsa has to say! Go on, Elsa, tell her! Or… wait. Maybe I should translate it into Scottish for you. A-hem, Prrrrrrrrincess Merrrrrrrrrrida, eye haf sumthink tay say tay y-"

Elsa winced and clapped a hand over Anna's mouth. "I… apologize for my sister. She gets excited about things. It happens when your diet is a solid three quarters chocolate."

"Multiply it by three an' make 'em all really, really fast, an' ye have me wee brothers," Merida said dryly. "But beside the point. Ye were hopin' tae say?"

Elsa winced again. "Erm. That is. I… well. I mean, it's nothing important. I just…"

"Mmmmmmmmf!" Anna said indignantly, Elsa's hand still clamping her mouth shut.

Elsa's stomach fell. Anna was wrong, that was clear. Whatever Elsa might have wanted (Or might not have!), Elsa's happiness was not the only thing at _stake _here. She was the queen, Merida's family was visiting royalty, their reputations would be _ruined _there would be diplomatic incidents and Scotland might cut off ties with Arendelle and in any event what did it even _matter _Merida would be going home in a few weeks and Elsa would never see her again and…

And…

_And if she's gone forever, in a few short weeks, _said a tiny voice in her head that sounded painfully like Anna, _do you really want to spend the rest of your life wondering what would have happened if you took the risk, just this one time?_

The logical part of her brain told her this voice was a stupid, stupid voice.

Anna, seemingly reading her mind, nodded her head enthusiastically.

Elsa sighed, her mind more than aware that she was listening to the wrong impulse here but dammit, she would not get a _moment _of peace otherwise. "Princess Merida. It… it occurs to me that I… maybe have been… hasty. In my treatment of you."

Merida snorted. "Och, hasty is the _last _word I would…"

Elsa took one step forward, and kissed her.

Not on the lips! God, no, not on the lips. She wasn't _insane, _they were in the middle of the palace gardens, and besides… risks were one thing, Merida-level risks were another. A brief peck, just to the side of the mouth. Something that could easily be interpreted as a simple greeting or expression of friendship.

Merida, who knew it was neither of those things, stood staring at her, jaw hanging open in shock.

"I… am quite fond of you, Princess. And… and as you have expressed an interest to closer examine the nature of this fondness," Elsa said, feeling the blush running full-force up her face, "I have… with some… some helpful advice from my premier advisor…"

"That's me!" Anna said helpfully.

"… decided to… to… perhaps be more… flexible. In allowing this. Examination," Elsa finished. "… … … … And now I need to go hide in my bedroom. If you ladies will excuse me."

The queen of Arendelle walked off with dignity and grace to lock her bedroom door and hide under her bed out of mortification, leaving her widely smiling sister and her openly baffled sorta-crush watching her go.

"I… tha'… she… tha'…_what _did the two of ye _talk _about?" Merida finally asked, her hand raised to gingerly touch the spot where Elsa's lips had pressed for that brief second.

"We confirmed," Anna said proudly, "that you are not a man!"

"…" Merida said.

"Also, romance novels!"

Merida, displaying wisdom her mother would call uncharacteristic, chose not to ask. She just watched the retreating Elsa enter the palace and slam the heavy door behind her, and smiled.


End file.
